Fast Love

I am still a teeny bopper to the core. Not sure if that's a good or bad thing. :) I joined George's fan club so I can get early access to his concert tickets. I also feel very guilty for "cheating" on John. Oh dear. I had George's music in my head as I slept last night. Every time I think about buying tickets and going to see him, I get an adrenaline rush and my heart races.

Hey Cupcake!

I've finished several cupcakes and two mini cupcakes. I gave away my prototype and my first "official" one--the service guy at the car dealership saw it and thought it was adorable, so I gave it to him. Why a 50+ year old man needs a girly knitted cupcake is none of my business, I suppose. :)

I'm kind of in a knitting rut since I've knit all the full-size cakes in Debbie Bliss cotton angora. I love the yarn and it works really well for the project, but I feel guilty that my sweets are all uniform. Where's the flair? I guess that will have to come later since I need to finish up my six-pack and minis before getting too creative. A certain girl has a pink Disney Princess toy oven. I am SO JEALOUS! It's very cute. And PINK!!!! Anyway, she needs to have girly cakes to go in her awesome oven, so this elf needs to get baking.

Kissing a Fool

HE'S COMING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My beloved George Michael announced a US tour. I've been a loyal fan since 1984. Kept the faith all these years. In my fairy tale dreams, I'd go to the show in LA--on his birthday!!!! Oh George...

I called QE to share the news and said he's going with me. Silence followed by a muted sigh. Now all I need is Mark Wahlberg to tour (fat chance!) and my torture trifecta will be complete. Too bad Marky Mark has forgotten his roots. I wanted to see sweat coming out of his pores. hahahahaha

HR Nerd Humor

Me: I forgot to tell you that every time I use “flex”, “FSA”, or “flexible spending account”, nobody knows what I’m talking about. It’s “benefits bank” here.

QE: Well if you used the proper terminology of “benefits bank” instead of your benefits slang like FSA maybe someone would understand. Jesh! What are you going to use next, “section 125”?

Mental Ward

The Goo Mental Hospital for Rebel Cats is going well. Our patient has been on Prozac since Friday. A quarter-tablet of human med is tiny and very difficult to administer to a squirmy 12-pound wiggler with sharp pointy teeth. She managed to spit out tonight's dose twice even after I chased it with water. The final product was pretty soft and eventually caused her to foam at the mouth--it's a bitter pill. Cara seems more mellow but is still opportunistic in chasing her siblings. She has less of an appetite but still eats, so no worries there since she needs to lose weight anyway.

The rescue recommended a harness so we can attach a bell to her. Our little Houdini has managed to escape and choke herself on regular collars, so they thought a harness is safer. I bought one today. It doesn't fit. It appears that our little girl isn't so little. I also bought her a wand toy since many of her toys are hand-me-downs. She loves it. I'll buy another one (or two) when I exchange the harness for a dog-sized one.

Overall, I think Cara is doing well. She seems to appreciate the time I spend with her, seeking pets and headbutting me. I must say, I can see how human children, even as adults, can perceive a parent's favored treatment of a sibling. I have been thinking about Cara constantly and miss her when I am away from home. That's not to say I don't love Angel or Davis, or that I love Cara more. It's just that Cara needs me more and my attention right now. A few of us were discussing parents recently and someone said that parents tend to favor the (Cara is purring right now! She NEVER purrs!!!) sorry...parents tend to favor or focus more attention on the troublemaker/failure/black sheep kid of the family because they cause parents more worry, even as adults. Is it true that parents tend to "favor" and focus more on the "bad" sibling? Obviously a blanket statement like that is just not valid, but I wonder if there would be a trend there if all parents answered a survey honestly. Maybe parents don't love one child more than another, but love each one differently. That's how I feel, at least. I assumed I loved Cara "less" since she's had less time to build up a reserve in my heart. Based on recent events, I'd say that my love for her is just as much as her siblings.

Druggies in the Family

Well, I suffered all week for nothing. My doc is apparently out of the state, possibly the country. I was so mad I didn't hear what they said. :) They said they couldn't reach me but they had my cell phone number. They called "several weeks ago" and DID NOT THINK TO TRY AGAIN!!! So now I must go back. Let me just say that I had this appt scheduled over a month ago. I've feared and dreaded this appointment the whole time. The pain, itching, and swelling is worse than my shots. The mental and emotional anguish I've had! Serenity now!!

I took Cara for her annual exam. I asked the vet for advice on how to promote family harmony and told her everything we've done and tried. She gently asked if we considered giving Cara up. Ouch. Yes, QE and I have discussed it, but never seriously. Hearing the suggestion from an impartial person, a medical professional no less, stung. The vet did mention a possible solution: Prozac. She said many of her patients are on it for various reasons. Our doctor didn't recommend or dissuade giving up Cara or Prozac. She only brought up two additional options. It would have been so much easier if she gave her opinion (but I respect her professionalism for not doing so.) Long story short, I went home heartbroken. The thought of losing Cara was unbearable. I cried. Cara came to see if I was ok (is that progress?!) but she guarded the stairs to prevent my HeartHealers from visiting (no progress here!).

Is this what we've become? A society that medicates our problems? From a parenting standpoint, I don't agree with medicating Cara. Regardless of what other people do to their human or furry children, I don't agree with drugging up the troublemakers or using drugs to solve our problems. It just doesn't seem fair to her since it's not medically necessary or live-saving. Will we have a zombie cat? Will Cara lose her zeal for life? I contacted the rescue and Cara's foster mom replied saying she highly recommends we try Prozac. Gyah. I guess it makes me feel better knowing I'm not a bad mom for medicating my baby. Screw my beliefs and values...I have to do what's best for Cara. And I guess Prozac is better than giving her up, right? Right??? I don't know, actually. As a selfish human, of course I want to keep Cara. She's my baby. Do I think staying with us is best for her? Possibly. I know we will give her the best care possible and all the love she can take. It's likely her next home might not be as patient or loving. I don't think other households would put up with her antics the way we have. The vet was shocked we've done it for a year. That's love, right? Love is supposed to be unconditional.

So, tomorrow I will be calling the vet for Prozac. We'll try it on a short term basis and see if she improves. Hopefully just a few months on it will ease tensions and build tolerance.

Screw Hugs, Gimme Drugs!

Two (possibly three) days without my allergy meds. I must stay clean until Thursday, when I get my back stabbed with fifty needles they call allergy testing. I think the government is really embedding nano machines in me or maybe injecting me with some mind-altering serum. :)

I was ok yesterday but it slammed me today. The itchy nose and throat, the sneezing, and overall irritation makes for a cranky me. I need drugs and lots of it. Pretty green bottles are my friends.

Celebrating Cara

Hard to believe it's already been a year since we brought Cara home. As QE puts it, "What??? A year? She hasn't adjusted at all." Ah, such is the story in the Goo house. Our little RaRa is nothing like the sweet, easygoing cutie she was at her foster mom's. We often joke that the white streak down her face is the rebel and bad-ass side that shines brighter than any other aspect of our Cara. We don't think she's happy with us, but we're making progress. Cara sometimes seeks head rubs. She can be affectionate on her own terms. Still no hugs or lap visits. We respect Davis' boundaries and rules but we just can't resist snuggling Cara. She is so cute!! Our rebel has turned our household upside down, but I am glad she's in our lives (I'm pretty sure I am the ONLY one in our family who feels this way!) It's fun to carb-load with Cara. We might even go vegan together. :) Her list of foods now includes Tofurky deli slices, waffles, english muffins, tortillas, bread, Kashi cereal, potato, french toast, and everything that isn't cookies or eggs. Happy one year, little one!

Guilty as Charged

My loot from the first day's shopping. The pile is higher than it seems--maybe I shouldn't admit that. :) Angel and I had a great time sorting through everything that night. I keep forgetting to take pictures of Round Two. My family came over this weekend and got a glimpse of my yarn room. Ooops. I would take pics of it, but it's incriminating even without the second day's loot.

In other yarn news, I am still developing a good cupcake pattern. My first run didn't go as I envisioned but it was still fun. Bought some beads today so I have more color varieties for cupcake sprinkles. Finished two pairs of mary jane-styled booties for piglet this past week too. What the heck am I going to do with all this yarn? Thinking of what to make and then finding the pattern is torture. Why can't there be a knitting fairy telling me what I should knit with each type of yarn? I bet Ravelry has some nifty tools and features but I am just not a techno person. I tried to use the site once. I didn't get it. Too complicated. :)

Bought a new camera a few weeks ago. It was a good deal. I take it everywhere I go. It's neat to chronicle daily things because I can. I still hate moving pics to our computer (is that uploading or downloading???) and then to Flickr. This technology crap is just not my thing. My ELPH has lots of cool features that I read about in the manual. I have no idea how to activate or use them now that the manual is put away. Elf barks after each pic. It amuses the kitties. Speaking of which...QE picked out a DVD for our kids (QE!!!!) I thought I was nuts for being amused and the store was nuts for selling such silliness. But QE actually suggested we buy it. Davis was captivated. My parents watched as Davis sat in front of the television like a little kid. It was adorable. They wouldn't have believed me if they didn't witness it themselves.

Knitter Type

You appear to be a Knitting Guru. You love knitting and do it all the time. While finishing a piece is the plan, you still love the process, and can't imagine a day going by without giving some time to your yarn. Packing for vacation involves leaving ample space for the stash and supplies. It can be hard to tell where the yarn ends and you begin.
http://marniemaclean.com

Red Ring of Death

I first learned this phrase from the cover of QE's XBox magazine. I thought it was a new game coming out. I waited for QE to gush about it, but he never did. Last week, we got a visit from the dreaded Red Ring of Death. QE was crushed. Heartbroken. Traumatized. Restless. It was painful to watch. He was worse than a drug addict in rehab. The box to ship his unit back to Microsoft came last night. I'm not clear if they will fix and return this specific machine to us or if we'll get a refurbished replacement. All told, QE will be without his BFF and soulmate for about a month. He is distraught.

I have to admit, the RRD is kind of pretty. The power symbol is green and the circle is red. Pretty bright lights...

Bags. The Anti-Kid.

Two old bags (calling them hens is offensive and insulting to female chickens--the gals from Chicken Run called and clucked me out) Anyway, two old bags at work were making anti-kid comments and then realized I might be a mother. One apologized for hating kids in front of me. Hilarious.

Picking Over the Plundering

I had to go back. I forgot to get my Insatiable Knitter's Card validated on Friday. Since I was there, I couldn't just ignore what was on sale! They had some nice stuff on sale, but I am SO glad I went on Friday. Most of what was on sale Saturday were leftovers from Friday (i.e. "good" yarn in less than desirable colors) and "eh" yarns. Everything was still very nice, just not my bag. I went around 4:00 p.m., so it's expected they were picked over from Friday and yesterday morning. SIL is not a knitter and even she was caught up in the moment. "This is so fun!" and "What a great deal!" she chirped as we dug through several bins.

QE invaded my privacy under the guise of taking the new load to my knitting room. I am still allowed to buy yarn but only if I can stand in there and tell him I need more yarn. He said I have enough start my own yarn store. Probably true, so I might have to consider that. :) Had I known he would spy on me, I wouldn't have unpacked my treasures from Friday. Hahaha

My Christmas Morning

It's about 6:30 a.m. I've been tossing and turning trying to sleep for at least half an hour. QE fed the kitties this morning but Davis refuses to go into his room unless I escort him. QE's attempts usually includes hissing and running. I got our boy into his room and went back to bed. Or at least tried to. Like a kid waiting for Christmas morning, my thoughts and excitement took over my mind and body, and now I can't sleep.

Between my yarn and the Piggies being here, I am overcome with joy and excitement. My brother and his wife look good. The piglet was sleeping (darn it!) so I couldn't hug him. Okay, so this is why I'm excited--the thought of holding piglet today is thrilling!! I'm happy and content that we don't have kids of our own (how would I maintain my yarn addiction??) but sometimes I wonder if I am missing out on some secret joy. It's weird how I've placed all my hopes and dreams into the little human we call piglet. He's not my child, but I have high expectations for him.

After some thought, I'm sort of glad we don't have human children. For the benefit of the child, I think it's important for a child to have at least one sibling. I might have been ok with one kid, but I can't see us with two. I think siblings are our link to our past and our connection to the future. At some point, our parents will pass away and we're only left with each other. We need someone who knew us 50 years ago as a child and to share memories. "Remember the time when Dad..." or "I still can't believe Mom..." There's something to be said for parents who space their children 2-3 years apart. I think it might be grueling for the parents to have two kids in diapers and two kids in college, but the benefits for the siblings essentially sharing the same childhood are pretty cool.

Now, the other reason why I am so stoked. I GOT YARN!!!! And lots of it! I dumped out all four bags and um, wow. It's way more than I remember buying. I feel guilty. Ok, so my receipt says I saved over $1,000, but it's still money I didn't NEED to spend and could be better used on something more practical. QE is still fine with it even after seeing my loot. Maybe he knows my self-inflicted guilt is punishment enough. :) I can't believe how lucky I am to have such an understanding enabler for a husband. How can he be so generous with our money? He says my happiness is worth it. I am so blessed to have QE.

My loot is at least twice the size of last summer's haul. More Manos than I can count. Lots of yarn (like angora) that I would never have bought. So many Koigu my head is spinning. Two pattern books for $1 each!!!! Some funky Debbie Bliss yarn that looks like boucle. Two BAGS of it! I hate boucle. 20 balls. A bag of alpaca silk in bright pink. Hey! I was in the heat of the moment! I had to grab it before someone else did! :) What is hilarious is that at least one person walked in for needles not knowing about the sale and got swept up into the frenzy. I somehow convinced the woman behind me in line to buy 6-8 hanks of a varigated bright pink cotton. She's a quilter and has no idea what to do with the yarn. I told her if she didn't want it, I'd buy it, so she took it. HAHAHAHAHAHA Peer pressure works.

I spent some time last night sorting my beauties. I told myself at the store that some of what I was buying was for Frap. It turns out that there's not much I'm willing to give up, even for sale. I don't think it's selfishness or greed talking as much as an addict lusting for the high. Maybe what I should do is sell part of my loot (noooooo!) for a profit on auction sites. My shelf most certainly cannot hold all of my yarn. I think I must go fondle now.

YARN!!!!!!!

Don't hate. Big sale. Up to 90% off. 124. 189. I'll let you guess which is the cost and which is the number of skeins. It's not all mine since I bought some with Frap in mind. But I would venture to say I'm keeping 95% of it for myself. I think I will more than double my stash. Skipping work and using leave (I'm in the negative) was worth it. Three girls were crossing the street to the store as I walked to my car. "Oh my God...did you buy all the Koigu????" Three shopping bags and one Whole Foods bag. QE is fully supportive. I married well. Totally lucked out in finding such a nice and loving husband who never controls, restricts or even comments about my spending. If anything, he complains I am too stingy and never treat myself. Every day is Valentine's Day for me. Stay tuned for pics and details.

Wiggly Piggy

The SIL (aka momma pig) reports that our little piglet is a very happy baby and never cries unless he needs something. She also noted that he's very lean because he's constantly moving and the longest baby amongst his piglet friends. I can't wait to see him. Oh Piglet! My plans to steal him are still on. I will pig-nap him and cart him around and show him off like the proud aunt I am.

She had me at hello

On Tuesday, February 26, we will celebrate seven years with Angel. How time flies! I wanted to post something on the actual date, but thought she deserved my full attention. A princess and diva would expect nothing less!

Some of you might already know that we went to the adoption fair to see another cat, Madeline. In the corner, an adorable blue-eyed girl kept crying and crying until someone took her out of her carrier. QE and I looked at several boys and girls, but this one kept crying this pitiful "get me out of here!!!" cry. We paid her some attention to console her and she loved it. QE fell in love with her paws. I sensed another couple looking at her. I quickly told the lady we wanted her. After a few reference checks, I brought Angel home.

In the beginning, we thought of Angel as a "pet". As she became more comfortable and realized she was at her forever home, Angel slowly trained us to meet her expectations. We used to sleep in our bedroom with the door closed. Angel cried endlessly at being left alone and headbutted the door. We finally kept our door open and welcomed her to come and go as she pleased. She marched into our room at dawn and would lay on me as I slept, waiting to be petted. Ok, I woke up on demand to pet her. Fast forward seven years and Princess Angel sleeps where she wants, especially our lap, without regard for our need to go potty, sleep, or anything else.

Angel taught me about selfless love and devotion. I had no idea I was capable of loving someone other than my spouse and family with that unconditional, protective, I'll-do-anything-for-you love. Maybe that's why I think of my kitties as my children. I'm pretty sure I love them the way human parents love their offspring. I first realized that Angel loved me back when QE and I were talking about her first hospital stay. I started crying at the thought my beloved Angel would be in a cage. In addition to being away from me for several days, my princess would be in a metal box! I was inconsolable. Angel walked into our room and started to cry a weird cry that we'd never heard before. She then walked to me, looked up, and started a sad meow. She let me cry on her shoulder until I was okay again, purring the whole time. Now, every time I cry, Angel and Davis come to console me. It's impossible to cry for long when my heart healers come. :)

We've been through so much with Angel. Her urinary/bladder issues have plagued us off and on from day one. We've been through two house moves and two stays with my folks with Angel. She's tolerated two pesky siblings invading her house and stealing her human servants. She's put up with our lack of parenting skills and absolutely cluelessness about how cats are superior. Angel is the perfect cat. QE and I foolishly thought all cats were so easygoing and sweet. She tricked us into adopting Davis, who couldn't be more different. Ok, so not all cats are like Angel--our mistake. She then led us to believe Siamese cats were a paw above those "other kinds". Siamese are vocal, loving, smart, and loyal. We adopted Cara thinking she would be a mini-Angel. Hooo-boy, were we wrong. Through it all, Angel remained a cutie-pie who loved us and forgave us for ruining her peaceful life.

Angel loves watching water go down drains. Once, the bathtub was draining after my bath. She was walking along the tiled ledge of the tub when I playfully nudged her. "Angel, mommy is going to push you in!!!" She kept walking even as I was pushing her! "As if, mom. I know you would never do it." QE was amazed at how much Angel trusted me.

I tell Angel every day that she's my best friend and that I need her, that she can't ever leave me. Angel is my first animal other than fish. I have no idea how to deal with loss and I hope (unrealistically) that I never have to. Just the thought of Angel not being with me brings me to tears. I can't go on vacation without thinking of her, missing her, or calling about her. How did a cat who came so close to death become so treasured? (Her brother/littermate Tigger was put down by their evil human before he could be rescued) Did I save Angel or did she save me? A cat who was supposed to be a "pet" became my daughter, my precious princess, my diva boss, my little best friend.

LOVE Liz!

As I previously mentioned, I was expecting a shipment of goodies from Liz Lovely. First, let me just say I'm not a big peanut butter cookie fan but Liz's are so darn awesome that I smile from the inside. It's hard for me to say if pb is better than the ginger, but I think it might have won my heart. Wah. So good. It's got a great flavor without that funky pb essence. I also ordered the Cowboy cookies (oatmeal, choc chip and walnut). It's good too, but it reminds me of cookie dough. I'm not big on cookie dough and never fight for the mixing bowl--that's all QE. How good are Liz cookies? So good that QE and I ignored the other temptations in our pantry all weekend. The Oreos (me), the Joe-Joes (QE), and everything else. We also got the dark chocolate covered pretzels (WAHHH!) and dark chocolate almonds (double WAAAAH!). The pretzels were intended for QE since he's a pretzel freak, but I found myself fighting the urge to hide them from him. And don't get me started on the almonds. So good. The chocolate isn't overly sweet. Just pure yum. Sigh...how can one place make so many goodies and have them all be organic/fair trade/vegan? That's just not fair. I am going to gain weight if I keep this up! Here's the best part--the dark choc covered stuff are on sale (if there's any left!). What's even more awesome is that they shipped the SAME DAY I ordered! That beats Estee Lauder, who ships the next business day. This is all Andy the Liz Marketing guy's fault--he sent me two free ginger cookies and got me to fall in love. Before, I knew about Liz but talked myself out of ordering by thinking it's vegan so it can't be as good as conventional homemade.

I also love that I can buy these goodies and know I am supporting a small business who truly believes in changing the world. It is very inspiring. The "plastic" tubs the choc stuff comes in is made from corn and can be composted. The flier insert about the company is from 100% recycled post-consumer waste paper produced by wind power. We CAN change the world. I think I'll do it one cookie at a time. :) And yes, I can't stop thinking about those poor cookies waiting for me. They are so lonely! I need to rescue them! In case you're wondering, the pretzels and almonds never made it to the pantry...they stay on our coffee table. :)

Conflicted Hippie

I've turned my back on the Humane Society. Their emails asking me to voice my opinions on baby seal clubbing, cockfighting, and cow slaughtering are too upsetting. Yes, I am a wimp. The pictures are not graphic but I still get very sad and upset. The last straw was a header on an email about boycotting Canadian seafood because the fisherman spend the off-season hunting and usually clubbing baby seals for fur. I didn't need to see a seal on the snow looking up at the human with a pole held over his head about to strike the seal. So, I've opted out of emails from the Humane Society. While I'm grateful and glad for all the work they do, I can only support them on my terms--these emails are unbearable for me. I know I can't pretend to be an ostrich and stick my head in the sand. But that's how I'm dealing right now...it's all I can handle.

I am expecting a shipment from Liz Lovely today. Who knew vegan cookies could taste so good?! It's actually amazing how yummy the ginger ones were. I wouldn't have known they were vegan in a blind taste test. The best part is that all the ingredients are "normal" stuff that can be found in a home baker's pantry. Okay, maybe not the palm fruit oil, but I've never tried looking for it at Whole Foods, so that could be a normal ingredient too.

After being ignored for several weeks (probably more like a month+), I am assembling my knitted cat. I've also finished my wrap using Fisherman. Still working on the kangaroo. I am dreading all the sewing.

Angel & Me

Angel decided to snuggle with me last night. I fell asleep with her under the covers, nestled into my side with my left arm around her. I woke up to her sleeping next to me. I am always amused when she sleeps like humans, with her head on my pillow and her body on the bed under the covers. I tend to have deeper, better sleep when Angel is next to me. Unfortunately I also tend to wake up more achy since I don't toss and turn as much. What's a few backaches when you're loved by a cat. :)